Scene Out of a Movie…

Saturday morning I looked around for a director ready to yell cut, but there was no director.

(To enjoy the following story it is best to play the music below while reading, trust me.)

First, lately I have been headed to Southeastern Ohio for many weekends. I got out of a conference early on Friday and since my plans had been cancelled earlier in the day, I decided I would drive to my parents Friday nights, so I could “sleep in” a bit more than if I left from Columbus to go down Saturday morning.

I awoke Saturday morning to Maggie attaching my feet, lovely little wench, this is a fun past time for her, a painful one for me. I showered, got ready and was out the door by 7:15am. Off to travel the 20-30 minutes to my parents store to work. I say 20-30 because it depends on how late I’m running and if I have time to actually avoid learning if my car corners like it’s on rails. I usually take St. Route 339 to get to the store, sometimes I’ll take St. Route 78, either one will make you car sick in just a few moments with all the hills and curves. I know 339 a bit better so it’s usually the route of choice. My father has the policy if you are not at the store by 8am when it opens you don’t get paid for the day and there are no exceptions.

I started out the drive way and had to “encourage” a guinea to get out of the damn road. Oh how I loath them, that noise is just awful. The drive out of town progressed with no worries. The radio stations in that area are limited and many are focused on Country music which I really am just not a fan. I cleaned out my car and currently only have two CD’s to listen to. One is Eminem and the other is Paddy Reilly. I wasn’t in a rap mood so early in the morning, so I cranked up o’Paddy and sang along with his trad Irish tunes.

I was in the middle of Fields of Athenrye when suddenly there was a turtle in the middle of the road, I dodged it, darting to the other side of the road-risking life and limb to save a turtle. Back on my side of the road and bam, another turtle right in my driving path, good grief, this time I skidded to the right side of the road, but avoided the grass and large ditch just past the road. Big sigh, back to the lovely morning drive and singing my little heart out. It’s best I only do this when driving alone as no others ears are offended.

Another mile down the road at the most and a darn rabbit darted in front of me, crap! Braked hard, avoided Abby’s cousin and moved along on my trip. A few songs play with little adventure in my drive. Then as I came around a rather large curve, I almost ran directly into a cow. A cow! It was just to the right side of the road as if it were supposed to be walking there. Now, I’ve seen cows before, good grief I grew up on a farm. I’ve even milked a cow in my life time, but cows are to be fenced in, secure from the road, but not this fat lady-she was just out for a morning jont.

Ok, at this point, I seriously looked around and thought ok, what kind of B movie am I in right now. Woman-- driving in the country--listening to trad Irish music--singing like her life depended on it---encountering random creatures on a simple drive. Now seriously, could this not be a scene in a movie. However there was no director, just me trying to get to work on time.

I did arrive at the store just before 8am.